My Definitive Song of the Summer of 2003
It was weeks or days to go before summer vacation. People wondered what to do or where to go after the school year ends. (I later learned that the classmate who introduced me to Linkin Park took a summer job, a former crush got pregnant out of wedlock, and another crush had a crush on a guy in another town.) Me? I was stuck in my village because I had no options. I just stayed at home and waited for a new song to come out.
I thought the last days of my junior year at secondary school would be boring. I was wrong. Thanks to Linkin Park.
Returning home after a heartbreaking day at school, the scene of my brother placing his ear near the radio greeted me. What caught his attention, I asked myself mentally. He told me Linkin Park just released a new song. I arrived home late that time, so I was only able to listen to the last lines, but man, it sounded great to me, especially the rapping parts.
A few days later, I got the chance to listen to “Somewhere I Belong” in full. My assessment was right: it was a great song. It helped me get through the gloomy summer of 2003. I got no places to go and no friends to hang out with (because they went places). I stayed in good mental health, thanks to this song, plus hits from Evanescence and .t.A.T.u.
Making (Failed) Plans for the Future
Linkin Park’s “Somewhere I Belong” inspired me to consider a music or performing arts course in college, a dream that was never materialized. Back then, I had in mind to pursue computer or teaching, but when the song came out, BOOM! I immediately changed my college plans. I wanted to be like Mike Shinoda. I want to be like Chester Bennington. I wanted to play turntables.
In other words, I wanted to become famous and tour the whole world. However, things did not turn out well for me.
It took years for me to realize I was never cut out for music and performing arts. I had to admit I can’t sing, I can’t rap, and I can’t play instruments no matter how hard I tried. I took guitar lessons and music classes and even tried to learn the keyboards and bass guitar, but I never got anywhere, despite help from a few friends.
I auditioned for school plays in order to boost my confidence before the crowds but I was never chosen for parts (I was only ordered to make accessories for the plays, which I did begrudgingly). I felt hurt and envious at the attention, praise, and rewards the lucky ones received.
Because I found no luck in performing arts, I tried sports but I was not lucky too.
Where do I belong anyway?
Moving Forward as a Linkin Park Street Soldier
I can’t sulk throughout my school years. I had to move on and adjust my life’s plans. I believe I could do my part for music listeners in some ways so that my love for music would not become insignificant in my growth as a person.
By listening to Linkin Park, I was able to release my fury and frustrations in life. I found strength in their lyrics, in their melodies, and in their performances. I realized I could contribute to music even without performing it.
I need to stay alive not just to preserve the memories of music but also to live to the music.
May the late Chester Bennington consider my contribution and my sacrifice pleasing to his ears. Thank you very much for keeping hope alive in my life. One day I will go to “Somewhere I Belong”.
Viva Chester Bennington!
Long live Linkin Park!
#RIPChesterBennington
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